It’s springtime, and you know what that means! It’s time for fresh plants.

I am not a good gardener. In fact, I might as well be the Grim Reaper for my plants, because as soon as they see me, they know bad news is coming. Even starter plants aren’t safe with me. I once killed a succulent, universally known as a great low-maintenance beginner plant, because I overwatered it.

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What can I say? I love too hard.

So when I recently stopped by Lowes to pick out a plant for my office, I knew whichever plant I chose was marked for a short life. I thought some greenery would liven up the room, and it was a great idea in theory, as long as the plant stayed green and did not immediately wither under my care.

I chose a — I don’t even know. I’ll be honest. I accidentally threw away the tag, and now I don’t remember what it’s called. It’s green and it has leaves and that’s all I can tell you about my beloved little plant.

And by beloved, I do mean beloved. This plant and I are best friends. It’s all the love of a pet without the responsibility of remembering to take care of it every day. But I’m still as affectionate with this plant as if it could meow.

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I water it once a week, no more, no less, on the day universally known as Thirsty Thursday. I check its leaves to make sure it’s not getting sunburnt. I even talk to it, which I’m told is a great way to get a plant to grow, though it also makes me look a little odd. That’s okay. I have my plant to keep me company; who needs friends?

All of this means it’s going to hurt me even more when I kill this plant, but for now, it’s still thriving in my office windowsill. It looks pretty good to me, at least, with my minimal knowledge of plant ownership.

Did you know plants have apps now? Apparently there really is an app for everything. I downloaded an app that can tell me whether or not my plant is healthy, and it can even give me a tentative diagnosis if the plant starts to look less-than-alive.

The app — Plantum, for those who are curious — has already saved me more than once. I learned my plant was getting too much sun, so I moved it off the windowsill for a few days. I learned I was overwatering, so I cut back on my watering schedule. So far, so good. It’s a delicate balance, but I have technology on my side.

And, of course, love can cure all.

I’m hoping my little plant will survive through sheer force of will, both on its part and mine. And maybe, if I can keep this one alive through the summer, I can justify getting more. I don’t have a green thumb quite yet, but maybe this is finally my time to shine. For the plant and me, spring is a chance for growth.

And, worst case scenario, fake plants are looking pretty realistic these days.

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